Yes, I am here to tell you today that Hobbits are indeed real. In fact, scientists have known Hobbits to be real since 2003. Unfortunately, they’re all dead. Probably. They were also Indonesian. No, I’m not joking.
Back in 2003, the partial remains of nine different people in a Liang Bua cave in Flores, Indonesia were discovered. They were then named Homo floresiensis, and they only stood about one meter tall. So if you’re like me and you don’t understand meters compared to feet, just know that they were really short. Like Hobbit short, because they’re Hobbits.
And I’m not just calling them Hobbits for the sake of calling them Hobbits. They’ve actually been nicknamed Hobbits by scientists and who-the-hell-ever.
But, hey, at this point, Indonesia is turning out to be a pretty fantastical place. I mean, they’ve got dragons too, and they’re not extinct yet.
Next we’ll find evidence of Elves. Or maybe an Indonesian mermaid.
Note: mermaids are TOTALLY real—if only.