I really wish this James Gunn controversy didn’t pop up as hard as it did this week. It took a lot away from the week. Mainly, THAT IT’S MUTHA-TRUCKEN CHRISTMAS TIME!
Oh, God, I’m sorry. That was awful. Just. Just jump.
So I thought this column would be suited for discussing gay and lesbian couples in some of our favorite Christmas movies. I knew I had one off the bat. Peppermint Patty and Marcie are regularly called a lesbian couple, and while I didn’t remember many speaking lines from either of the characters, I knew they would give me a start.
Until I watched Charlie Brown Christmas and discovered that both Marcie and Peppermint Patty aren’t even in the movie.
They aren’t in the movie. Promise.
And this wasn’t some random thing. This was a trend. Every Christmas classic I watched had no one with an ounce of homosexual tendencies in them. There could be an argument that, because Home Alone’s Kevin McAllister was disgusted by the Playboy magazine in Buzz’s room, he’s gay, but he’s also like eight, so that’s a stretch.
I did a quick Google search for “Christmas Movies, gay couples,” and found a bunch of Christmas movies on Amazon that are more comedies centered around drag culture.
There is seriously no Christmas movie about a family, complete with mom, mom and 2.5 kids? Or dad and dad?
This is 2012. We can do it. I have faith in Hollywood. There should be a movie with a homosexual couple celebrating Christmas. Screw the protests.