Trailer Tuesdays: I, Frankenstein

Should I start crying now or later?

Seriously, there are so many interesting stories out there, waiting to be told, missing out on their chance at the big screen because some production company thought “yes, what we need is a generic dark urban fantasy story about Harvey Dent fighting shapeshifting gargoyles. Oooh, and let’s throw an innocent and generic blonde romantic interest, some religious imagery, and lots of explosions in, too!”

I first saw this trailer in front of Catching Fire, and I think it boggled me all the more because I was so excited to see Katniss and Johanna kicking ass. I just can’t believe it’s nearly 2014 and a story with an angsty cis hetero male ‘monster with a heart of gold’ protagonist is still considered so bankable that someone greenlighted this film without realizing how terrible it sounded. The market isn’t totally glutted on gritty urban fantasy reboots of old stories, so good job on that. Way to muck around with the seminal science fiction story.

I’m especially appalled because there doesn’t seem to be any sort of clear plot. Is Eckhart’s character going to fight against the other Frankenstein’s monster creatures? Is he going to ally with them or unleash them on the bad gargoyle people? What are the gargoyle people? Where did they come from? Why are they attacking people? Why is Aaron Eckhart’s character immortal? What is the connection between him and the gargoyles? According to the Wikipedia page, the blonde lady is a scientist, but I can’t tell that at all from the trailer. Also according to Wikipedia, there are also fallen angels and demons in this movie as well as shapeshifting gargoyle creatures. Because it wasn’t already confusing enough.

Eowyn, what are you doing in this mess??

Eowyn, what are you doing in this mess??

It’s apparently based on a graphic novel written by the same guy who wrote the Underworld movies, but when I went to see if it was well received, I discovered that it doesn’t even have an Amazon listing where reviews could be posted. I’m not a huge fan of Underworld, but at least they had a clear plotline and a lady lead—this fails on both counts.

By far the most alarming thing about this trailer is that, when this movie is a financial disaster, no one will blame the loss on the race or gender of the main character. Sigh. Thanks for more of the same, Hollywood.