With the exception of Black Sails, I don’t think there’s anything Michael Bay has worked on that I like. This includes the Transformers movies, which I keep watching, because for some stupid reason I always think “maybe this one will be good”. I have no doubt that the same will be true for The Last Knight.
I don’t think it’s too important to talk about The Last Knight’s plot, because let’s face it, not a single one of these movies has had a memorable storyline. Transformers show up, cities get destroyed, product placement is everywhere, we have what now feels like an obligatory racist stereotype and a female character who’s there to look pretty, and those of us who actually watched the cartoons as children feel our souls die a little inside.
The previous movie was probably the worst one in the franchise for me. It was just too long, had too many things going on, and the dinosaurs didn’t show up until the end. It also stepped up on its misogyny in ways I wasn’t expecting. I didn’t mention this in the review, because I just didn’t want to think about it—the main character’s sexy lamp of an underage daughter who does nothing but get kidnapped, is dating an older man, and the movie actually pauses itself to explain a caveat in our statutory rapes laws in order to justify it.
With that in mind, I have no hopes for the new female character this time around. She also does absolutely nothing in the trailer except be kidnapped as well. She’s played by Gemma Chan, and having a woman of color would excite me if Michael Bay also wasn’t racist as fuck. So instead, I’m just wondering in what new ways I’ll be horrified.
Whatever racism there will be this time around, though, will also come with an unwanted dose of Nazism. During the movie, we get to visit Churchill’s birthplace Blenheim Palace, which has been turned into a Nazi headquarters. I understand that Churchill wasn’t a saint either, but there’s something about hanging swastikas all over Blenheim Palace that amazingly has upset a lot of people. Given the current political climate, Nazism is seeing a reemergence, so I can’t say that seeing it in a big-budget film is either wanted or appropriate. In case anyone is wondering, the appropriate time to hang swastikas on Churchill’s birthplace—or anywhere, for that matter—is never.
I would recommend we all skip this movie, but given how much money all the previous installments have made, at this point I think it’s pretty clear we’re all going to show up anyway. It’s set to reach theaters June 21st, and I guess I’ll see you all there.