Trailer Tuesdays: Star Wars: Episode VIII: The Last Jedi

Yoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!! Yoooooooooooooo!!!!!! Yo, the gat dang Last Jedi trailer is here. Are you hype? I’m hype.

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Trailer Tuesdays: 300: Rise of An Empire

So… there’s a new 300 movie out. And apparently it’s killing at the box office. Yep. So let’s talk about the trailer, I guess.

This movie… I just don’t have words. Why does this movie exist? I actually really liked the first 300 movie. I thought it was well shot and the acting was pretty good. Yes, it was racist, ableist, and sexist, but when I turned off my critic brain I was, admittedly, entertained. The way the movie ended was perfect, so once again we have Hollywood making unnecessary sequels just so that they can make some more money.

300 rise of an empireBased on the trailer I can see why the movie is doing so well—it’s flashy, action-packed, and filled with dudebros—but that doesn’t mean it’s actually any good. For one, this sequel seems to be hanging onto its sexism, starring a very limited female cast of what seems like only two women. One of them is Queen Gorgo, who was in the last movie, and now we have an evil female character in the form of Artemisia. Artemisia is apparently a real person, which I didn’t know until recently, so thank you, movie, for teaching me something. Artemisia is also a real bad guy (from a Greek perspective anyway). She was a Greek who joined Xerxes’s forces and led a naval force against the Greeks. However, with her inclusion, we once again have been given women who fulfill two of the biggest female tropes: the noble faithful wife and the evil woman. Not that the original 300 was ever a bastion of feminism, but if they were going to do a sequel, did the writers have to include some evil woman instead of an awesome Spartan woman who is actually fighting and not being sexually assaulted? It’s good that the movie has more than one woman, but historically, Spartan women were actually pretty liberated for their time. Spartan women were known to be just as fierce as the men and were also trained in combat. I would have preferred seeing some Spartan women fight (like a whole Spartan woman army) instead of just these overused tropes that do the Spartans an injustice.

On top of this, we have the special effects. In the last movie, the filming and effects were pretty epic. Yet this trailer makes it seem like they’ve gone a bit overboard with said effects. Most movies do, nowadays, but that’s no excuse for this movie to do it as well. The clips of the naval battle don’t even look real. In fact, nothing about this movie looks real. Yes, the effects in the last movie were also very surreal, but the special effects have been amped to the point where this is practically a cartoon. Pirates of the Caribbean did better at naval battles.

I will, however, say this: the last movie was entertaining as long as you turned your brain off almost completely, so I’m assuming this one will be about the same. So go see it, I guess… just maybe be a little drunk when you do. Or wait for the DVD.

Trailer Tuesdays: Godzilla (2014)

I don’t know what annoys me more, the fact that Hollywood keeps remaking old movies instead of doing something new—because they think that our new technology can totally make the movie better—or that when Hollywood remakes these movies, it constantly features white people even in a story that is about the Japanese!

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Trailer Tuesdays: Once Upon a Time in Wonderland

I absolutely adore the TV show Once Upon a Time. While almost every other TV show features white guys as the main protagonist, it was refreshing to see a show with a female lead and a large cast of female supporting characters. That’s not to say Once Upon a Time isn’t without its problems, but it’s still an excellent show.

One of my main disappoints with the show, however, was the lack of one character: Alice from Alice in Wonderland. Since the Mad Hatter had made an appearance in Storybrooke, I was excited to meet Alice eventually, but it never happened. I was simply holding out hope that eventually Emma and the gang would meet Alice, but the writers of Once Upon a Time did something even better: I got a spin-off all about Alice.

If the trailer is anything to go by, it looks like we are going to have a kick ass Alice for this show. I was a little worried at first when things started in an asylum. I love a creepy Alice just as much as the next girl, but it has been done before. So I’m happy to see that while things look intense in this trailer, the writers aren’t taking Alice the dark gothic route.

As far as casting goes we have a pretty phenomenal cast, so far featuring Naveen Andrews (Lost), Michael Socha (Being Human), and the amazing John Lithgow who is voicing the White Rabbit.

I’m excited to see different worlds we haven’t been able to see in Once Upon a Time. So far, from the trailer and characters it seems pretty certain that we’ll get to see more of Wonderland, Neverland, and Agrabah.

It’s also nice to see that the show will make a distinction between the Red Queen and the Queen of Hearts, which has always been a pet peeve of mine in other re-tellings of Alice. Michael Socha will also being playing the Knave of Hearts, who is in the original story, and it seems in this version, Alice stops the Queen of Hearts from killing him making him an ally of hers. It always made sense to me that should Alice return to Wonderland, that the Knave would be a friend of hers, but often the Knave isn’t featured or, as in the crappy Tim Burton film, he’s shown to be a villain. It seems then that the writers are letting the original source material inspire them while still creating their own story.

And for those of you worried about the writers potentially casting someone new as the Mad Hatter, the writers have already stated that they wouldn’t dream of replacing Sebastian Stan—so it’s likely the Mad Hatter simply won’t play much of a role in this TV show.

Usually I don’t look forward to spin-offs, but I cannot wait for this one.

Trailer Tuesdays: After Earth

Yes, I know this movie just came out recently, but I haven’t seen it yet, and it only came out a couple days so I think I’m still within my blogger rights to review the trailer.

It’s summer time and Will Smith is in an action movie. That seemed to be the norm for a long time, but now that I think about it, I haven’t seen Will Smith in many movies lately, or at least many action ones. But this time it seems like the burden of providing most of the action actually is on Will Smith’s son, Jaden Smith. In After Earth, Will and Jaden play a father and son team that crash lands on… Earth? So apparently one thousand years ago humanity left Earth for… reasons, but now Will Smith and his son have crash landed there, and they need to retrieve some sort of beacon in order to get home. But there’s a twist: everything on Earth has evolved to kill humans now. Again because of reasons… reasons that I assume will be connected with some surprise twist ending about why humans left the planet in the first place. Maybe the plants killed people? No, wait, it’s all actually Jaden Smith’s dream, or it’s faeries, or normal people dressing in yellow robes to scare everyone and hide the fact they live in modern times. Or maybe the twist is that it’s set in a world where Avatar: The Last Airbender didn’t suck.

As you may have guessed from my thinly veiled sarcasm, this movie is directed by M. Night Shyamalan. Which leaves me in something of a conundrum when it comes to whether or not I should see this movie. You see, almost all Will Smith movies are good. That is just fact. Even if it’s not good in the sense that it has a good plot, it’s always at least entertaining and enjoyable to watch. But M. Night Shyamalan has, in recent years, been a terrible director, but his early movies were so good I think I just want to always given him a chance to redeem himself. The movie looks exciting. Furthermore, and perhaps most importantly, the movie stars two characters of color, which is something movies don’t often do, especially sci-fi movies. That alone might be the reason I see this movie, even if the plot seems to set itself up with one too many twist endings.

We’ll have to wait and see if this will be an exciting movie or another M. Night Shyamalan failure at making a comeback.

Trailer Tuesdays: Despicable Me 2

I am so excited for this movie I can’t even contain my joy!

Despicable Me 2 brings us the return of Edith, Margo, Agnes, and their now formerly villainous parent, Gru. I’m not sure what Gru is doing now that he is no longer villainous. The trailer kind of implies that he has been out of the game for a while. I hope we get to see Gru working some tedious normal job so that he can make enough money to raise the girls. Whatever the case, it will be nice to see three of my favorite young female characters.

For a brief second I was excited that Margo asked why it mattered if she was texting a boy or a girl, because I thought that maybe there would be some young love between her and another young girl, which would be awesome. There are so many movies for kids that stress heteronormativity (like every Disney movie ever), which can makes things really awkward for LGBTQ kids growing up, since they never see any sort of relationships that apply to them. It’s time for a kids movie or show, or whatever to step up to the plate and makes this a reality. It’s time. Sadly, the trailer doesn’t suggest that Margo may be in love with a girl, but it doesn’t preclude the possibility either—though I’m probably just projecting my own desires on to this brief scene.

We also have an awesome new red-headed female character named Lucy, played by the equally awesome Kristen Wiig. At first I thought she might be acting as the bad guy in this film, but the trailer seems to imply that they will actually be allies. So yay! New female character!

So yes, beyond excited for this movie. If I were you, I would go see it come July.

Trailer Tuesdays: Identity Thief and The Heat

I have two trailers for you this week which both feature Melissa McCarthy. She is actually one of my new favorite actresses, so have a look!

They are two very different movies, and they both look good. Melissa McCarthy is playing two very different characters, and both are very different from her character in Bridesmaids (which is the only other place I’ve seen her). I’m also really excited for more female-targeted comedies. There have been so many movies for so long that have only focused on guys, and while some of them are genuinely funny for everyone I can only watch Will Ferrell run around in his underpants for so long. It’s nice to see comedies to which I, as a female, can relate; it’s been a long time coming.

I’m more excited for The Heat than Identity Thief. What about you guys?

Trailer Tuesdays: Silent Night

… Ugh! I hate horror movies made for Christmas—they are always bad, and they just put me in a bad mood. I suppose this movie is loosely based off the idea of the Krampus, who is an evil version of Santa that punished bad kids. But this mostly seems like some crazy person dressing up like Santa and attacking topless women.

Horror movies can be really good and interesting, like A Clockwork Orange. This is no A Clockwork Orange.

Speaking of which, Malcolm McDowell, why are you in this movie? You are such a talented actor but you get sucked into these really crappy movies and I don’t know why you agree to be a part of them.

So basically, if you want horror that will be really bad go see Silent Night. If you want to watch a good horror movie I suggest you watch anything but this.

Trailer Tuesdays: Hansel and Gretel Witch Hunters

Jeremy Renner is back in theaters this January, but this time not as our beloved Hawkeye, but rather as Hansel in the new movie, Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters.

The trailer seems exciting, action packed, and interesting enough that I will go see it. Maybe even really enjoy it, who knows? It doesn’t appear to be a very outside the box type of movie however, it seems to be the typical “spice up the fairy tale by making it darker and more action-packed” type that we have been seeing lately. That wouldn’t necessarily a bad thing, but so far most of those movies have only been okay, if not downright terrible. So if Hansel and Gretel really want to impress, they are going to have to do something different and, based on the trailer, it doesn’t seem like they’re going to.

There are a couple concerns I have about what I saw in this trailer. At one point in the trailer Hansel says something about Gretel being kidnapped. Now Gretel seems pretty capable throughout the trailer so I will be really annoyed if the movie deteriorates into damsel-in-distress type story and puts all if not most of the focus on Hawkeye Hansel.

Another comic book movie alumni will be featured in this movie: Famke Janssen who notably played Jean Grey in the X-Men movies is playing… Muriel. Well, I have no idea who that is, and the trailer doesn’t tell us, so here’s hoping she plays a cool character.

For now I reserve judgement on Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters and hope for the best.

Trailer Tuesdays: Once Upon a Time Season 2

Here we go! A sneak peak at season two of Once Upon a Time. I wrote a review of Season 1 in case any of you need to refresh on how and why this show is awesome.

So Captain Hook breaks into Mr. Gold’s shop. Hrm… I wonder how he got there since he is not a fairytale character. What are we going to have next, Colonel Mustard chillaxin’ with Boromir on the beach? Or are Tigger and Robin Hood going to steal from the rich and give to the poor together? Maybe the Count of Monte Cristo is going to team up with Captain Hook to defeat Mr. Gold.

Now I’m getting a little crazed, but my feeling is stick with the actual fairytale characters. It’s not like they are in short supply. Once Upon a Time has a good thing going already, and they don’t need to step outside of fairytales to keep it up.